the NEW politically correct 12 days of Christmas
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Thread: the NEW politically correct 12 days of Christmas

  1. #1
    Gunco Girleen pistol-packin-wifey's Avatar
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    Jun 2005
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    Talking the NEW politically correct 12 days of Christmas

    The 12 Days of Christmas, Deconstructed

    On the 12th day of the Eurocentrically imposed midwinter festival, my potential-acquaintance-rape-survivor gave to me:

    TWELVE males reclaiming their inner warrior through ritual drumming.

    ELEVEN pipers piping (plus the 18-member pit orchestra made up of members in good standing of the Musicians Equity Union as called for in their union contract even though they will not be asked to play a note...)

    TEN melanin-deprived testosterone-poisoned scions of the patriarchal ruling class system leaping,

    NINE persons engaged in rhythmic self-expression,

    EIGHT economically disadvantaged female persons stealing milk-products from enslaved Bovine-Europeans,

    SEVEN endangered swans swimming on protected wetlands,

    SIX enslaved fowl-Europeans producing stolen nonhuman animal products,

    FIVE golden symbols of culturally sanctioned enforced domestic incarceration,

    NOTE: after member of the Animal Liberation Front threatened to throw red paint at my computer, the calling birds, French hens and partridge have been reintroduced to their native habitat. To avoid further animal-European enslavement, the remaining gift package has been revised.

    FOUR hours of recorded whale songs,

    THREE deconstructionist poets,

    TWO Sierra Club calendars printed on recycled processed tree carcasses

    And an Animal Rights activist chained to an old-growth pear tree.
    "The friendliness and charity of our countrymen can always be relied upon to relieve their fellow citizens in misfortune.... Federal aid in such cases encourages the expectation of paternal care on the part of the Government and weakens the sturdiness of our national character...." -- President Grover Cleveland
    Teach a man to fish, but if he'd rather turn around and steal your catch, shoot him.

  2. #2
    Carolina Girl Taz38's Avatar
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    Dec 2004
    Charleston, SC
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    ROTFLMAO--that is great

    I really hope they keep the original lyrics--it took me long enough to learn those

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