Results 1 to 3 of 3

Thread: Behavioral problems?

  1. #1
    Poof no eyebrows klauss's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2004
    Location
    ohio
    Posts
    1,421
    Feedback Score
    0

    Default Behavioral problems?

    23 is my favorite, but the others are good as well.

    Behavioral problems?

    #1...Why do we press harder on a remote control when we know the batteries are getting weak?

    #2..Why do banks charge a fee on "insufficient funds" when they know there is no money in the account?

    #3...Why does someone believe you when you say there are four billionstars, but check when you say the paint is wet?

    #4...Why doesn't glue stick to the bottle?

    #5...Why do they use sterilized needles for death by lethal injection?

    #6...Why doesn't Tarzan have a beard?

    #7...Why does Superman stop bullets with his chest, but ducks when you throw a revolver at him?

    #8...Why did Kamikaze pilots wear helmets?

    #9...Whose idea was it to put an "S" in the word "lisp"?

    #10..If people evolved from apes, why are there still apes?

    #11..Why is it that no matter what color bubble bath you use the bubbles are always white?

    #12..Is there ever a day that mattresses are not on sale?

    #13..Why do people constantly return to the refrigerator with hopes that something new to eat will have materialized?

    #14..Why do people keep running over a string a dozen times with their vacuum cleaner, then reach down, pick it up, examine it, then put it down to give the vacuum one more chance?

    #15..Why is it that no plastic bag will open from the end you first try?

    #16..How do those dead bugs get into those enclosed light fixtures?

    #17..When we are in the supermarket and someone rams our ankle with a shopping cart then apologizes for doing so, why do we say, "It's all right?" Well, it isn't all right so why don't we say, "That hurt, you stupid idiot?"

    #18..Why is it that whenever you attempt to catch something that's falling off the table you always manage to knock something else over?

    #19..In winter why do we try to keep the house as warm as it was in summer when we complained about the heat?

    #20..How come you never hear father-in-law jokes?

    #21..If at first you don't succeed, shouldn't you try it like your wife told you to do it?

    #22..And obviously if at first you don't succeed, then don't take up sky diving!

    And my FAVORITE......

    #23...The statistics on sanity are that one out of every four persons is suffering from some sort of mental illness. Think of your three best friends, if they're okay, then it's you.
    "We are all born ignorant, but one must work hard to remain stupid."
    -Benjamin Franklin

    "If the Good Lord wanted me to use percussion caps I reckon the river beds would be full of 'em for the takin"
    Old flintlock shooter I met at the range.

    In this day and age it is easier to stay stupid than it is to stay ignorant. I have had the misfortune to have encountered many informed idiots

  2. #2
    Gunco Chick Sandy's Avatar
    Join Date
    Mar 2004
    Location
    IL
    Posts
    968
    Feedback Score
    0

    Default

    Those are hilarious!

    I love this one:
    #13..Why do people constantly return to the refrigerator with hopes that something new to eat will have materialized?
    Ain't that the truth!
    ~Americanwoman

  3. #3
    Gunco Apostle konrue66's Avatar
    Join Date
    Feb 2005
    Location
    Arkansas
    Posts
    1,088
    Feedback Score
    6 (100%)

    Default

    Very funny I want to know how to get my wife to stop doing this one.


    Quote Originally Posted by klauss
    #19..In winter why do we try to keep the house as warm as it was in summer when we complained about the heat?
    Gunco Member 2241
    NRA Life Member

Search tags for this page

There are currently no search engine referrals.
Click on a term to search our site for related topics.

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •