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Thread: Judgement

  1. #1
    jrs is offline
    B.U.F. (Bald, Ugly, Fat) jrs's Avatar
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    Nov 2008
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    Talking Judgement

    One evening, after attending the theatre, two gentlemen were walking
    down the avenue when they observed a rather well-dressed and attractive
    lady walking just ahead of them. "I'd give $500.00 to spend the night
    with that woman." To their surprise, the young lady overheard the
    remark and turning around, she said, "I'll take you up on that." She
    had a neat appearance and a pleasant voice, so after bidding his
    companion goodnight, the man accompanied the lady to ther apartment,
    where they immediately went to bed.

    The following morning, he presented her with $250.00 as he prepared
    to leave. She demanded the rest of the money, stating, "If you don't
    give me the other $250.00, I'll sue you for it." He laughed, saying,
    "I'd like to see you get it on these grounds."

    The next day, he was surprised when he received a summons ordering his
    presence in court as defendant in a lawsuit. He hurried to his lawyer
    and explained the details of the case. His lawyer said, "She can't
    possibly get a judgement against you on such grounds. but it will be
    interesting to see how her case is presented."

    After the usual preliminaries, the lady's lawyer addressed the court
    as follows:

    "Your Honor, my client, this lady, is the owner of a piece of property
    - a garden spot surrounded by a profuse growth of shrubbery, which she
    agreed to rent to the defendant for a specified length of time, for the
    sum of $500.00. The defendant took possession of the property, used it
    extensively for the purpose for which it was rented; but upon evacuating
    the premises, he paid only $250.00, one-half of the amount agreed upon.
    The rent was not expensive, since this restricted property was not
    available to all, and we ask judgement be granted the plantiff to assure
    payment of the balance."

    The defendant's lawyer was impressed and amused at the way his opponent
    had presented the case. His defense, therefore, was somewhat altered
    from the way he originally planned it.

    "Your Honor", he said, "My client agrees that the young lady has a fine
    piece of property, that he did rent such property from her for a time
    and did derive a degree of pleasure from the transaction. However, my
    client found a well on the property, around which he placed his own
    stones, sank a shaft and erected a pump, all labor being performed
    personally by him. We claim these improvements to the property were
    sufficient to offset the rental of said property. We, therefore, ask
    that judgement not be granted."

    The young lady's lawyers' comeback was thus:

    "Your Honor, my client agrees that the defendant did find a well on
    the property and that he did make improvements, such as my opponent
    has described. however, had the defendant not known the well existed
    he would never have rented the property. Also, upon evacuating the
    premises, the defendant removed the stones, pulled out the shaft and
    took the pump with him. In doing so he not only dragged his equipment
    through the shrubbery but left a hole much larger than it was prior
    to his occupance, making it easily accessible to little children.
    We, therefore, ask judgement be granted."

    --- AND SHE GOT IT!
    "A great civilization is not conquered from without until it has destroyed itself from within.", Will Durant

    "All that is necessary for the triumph of evil is that good men do nothing.", Edmund Burke

  2. #2
    Gunco Member ProjectCamaro's Avatar
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  3. #3
    Hang them high Judge. jimmy t's Avatar
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    Bravo for the little girl.
    Your in my Mind, and in my Sights

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