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Thread: The Americans With No Abilities Act (AWNAA)

  1. #1
    jrs
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    Talking The Americans With No Abilities Act (AWNAA)

    WASHINGTON, DC - Congress is considering sweeping legislation which will provide new benefits for many Americans. The Americans with No Abilities Act (AWNAA) is being hailed as a major legislative goal by advocates of the millions of Americans who lack any real skills or ambition.

    'Roughly 50 percent of Americans do not possess the competence and drive necessary to carve out a meaningful role for themselves in society,' said New York Senator Hillary Rodham Clinton. 'We can no longer stand by and allow People of Inability to be ridiculed and passed over. With this legislation, employers will no longer be able to grant special favors to a small group of workers, simply because they have some idea of what they are doing.'

    In a Capitol Hill press conference, House Majority Leader Nancy Pelosi and Senate Majority Leader Harry Reid pointed to the success of the U.S. Postal Service, which has a long-standing policy of providing opportunity without regard to performance. Approximately 74 percent of postal employees lack any job skills, making this agency the single largest U.S. employer of Persons of Inability.

    Private-sector industries with good records of nondiscrimination against the Inept include retail sales (72%), the airline industry (68%), and home improvement 'warehouse' stores (65%). At the state government level, the Department of Motor Vehicles also has a great record of hiring Persons of Inability (63%).

    Under the Americans with No Abilities Act, more than 25 million 'middle man' positions will be created, with important-sounding titles but little real responsibility, thus providing an illusory sense of purpose and performance.

    Mandatory non-performance-based raises and promotions will be given, to guarantee upward mobility for even the most unremarkable employees. The legislation provides substantial tax break s to corporations that promote a significant number of Persons of Inability into middle-management positions, and gives a tax credit to small and medium-sized businesses that agree to hire one clueless worker for every two talented hires.

    Finally, the AWNA Act contains tough new measures to make it more difficult to discriminate against the Non - abled by banning for example, discriminatory interview questions such as: 'Do you have any skills or experience which relate to this job?'

    'As a Non-abled person, I can't be expected to keep up with people who have something going for them,' said Mary Lou Gertz, who lost her position as a lug-nut twister at the GM plant in Flint , Michigan , due to her lack of any discernible job skills. 'This new law should really help people like me.' With the passage of this bill, Gertz and millions of other untalented citizens will finally see a light at the end of the tunnel.

    Said Senator Ted Kennedy before he died: 'As a Senator with No Abilities, I believe the same privileges that elected officials enjoy ought to be extended to every American with no abilities. It is our duty as lawmakers to provide each and every American citizen, regardless of his or her adequacy, with some sort of space to take up in this great nation.'
    jrs
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    "A great civilization is not conquered from without until it has destroyed itself from within.", Will Durant

    "All that is necessary for the triumph of evil is that good men do nothing.", Edmund Burke

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    Gunco Member 2ndamndmnt's Avatar
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    wish i knew how to save that w/out typing word for word.

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    jrs
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    Quote Originally Posted by 2ndamndmnt View Post
    wish i knew how to save that w/out typing word for word.
    Select the text in your browser as you would in any other program and copy (CTRL-C) then paste (CTRL-V) into an open Word or Notepad window.
    jrs
    --
    "A great civilization is not conquered from without until it has destroyed itself from within.", Will Durant

    "All that is necessary for the triumph of evil is that good men do nothing.", Edmund Burke

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    Gunco Member Budda Budda Jam's Avatar
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    Good Bye America. So much for hard work and dedication to your job. Now they can just hire anyone who is retarded and pay them just as much as you.

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    Gunco Rookie BigSal's Avatar
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    ha!

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    Gunco Rookie BigSal's Avatar
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    I need to get up to 15 posts. this was funny though!

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    Gunco Member celticfire's Avatar
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    Default It would be truly funny, and still is, except for one thing.

    It's basically true.

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    Gunco Member CYCOVILLE's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by celticfire View Post
    It's basically true.
    And to perpetuate the problem, they are dumbing down the education system so that these types of students APPEAR smarter at the cost of the students who actually are smart and have a chance to make it in life.
    I HAVE NO LORDS OR MASTERS
    I BOW BEFORE NO ONE

    american3p.org


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    Gunco Member funwithbeltfeds's Avatar
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    Where do i get these benefits??

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    GuncoHolic BBill's Avatar
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    I retired from GM- My father retired from GM. He used to say about affirmative action--"Yesterday I couldn't spell foreman- Today I IS one" !!

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