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Old 03-08-2006, 02:10 PM   #1 (permalink)
Poof no eyebrows
 
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Default 25 signs you are older

25 SIGNS YOU HAVE GROWN UP
>
>1. Your houseplants are alive, and you can't smoke any of them.
>
>
> 2. Having sex in a twin bed is out of the question.
>
>
> 3. You keep more food than beer in the fridge.
>
>
> 4. 6:00 AM is when you get up, not when you go to bed.
>
>
> 5. You hear your favorite song in an elevator.
>
>
> 6. You watch the Weather Channel.
>
>
> 7. Your friends marry and divorce instead of "hook up" and "break up."
>
>
> 8. You go from 13 days of vacation time to 140.
>
>
> 9. Jeans and a sweater no longer qualify as "dressed up."
>
>
> 10. You're the one calling the police because those %&@# kids next door
>
> won't turn down the stereo.
>
>
> 11. Older relatives feel comfortable telling sex jokes around you.
>
>
> 12. Yo don't know what time Taco Bell closes anymore.
>
>
> 13. Your car insurance goes down and your car payments go up.
>
>
> 14. You feed your dog Science Diet instead of McDonald's leftovers.
>
>
> 15. Sleeping on the couch makes your back hurt.
>
>
> 16. You take naps.
>
>
> 17. Dinner and a movie is the whole date instead of the beginning of
>one.
>
>
> 18. Eating a basket of chicken wings at 3 AM would severely upset,
>rather than settle, your stomach.
>
>
> 19. You go to the drug store for ibuprofen and antacid, not condoms and
>pregnancy tests.
>
>
> 20. A $4.00 bottle of wine is no longer "pretty good shit."
>
> 21. You actually eat breakfast food at breakfast time.
>
> 22. "I just can't drink the way I used to" replaces "I'm never going to
>drink that much again."
>
> 23. 90% of the time you spend in front of a computer is for real work.
>
> 24. You drink at home to save money before going to a bar.
>
> 25. When you find out your friend is pregnant you congratulate them
>instead of asking "Oh shit what the hell happened?"
>
> Bonus:
>
> 26: You read this entire list looking desperately for one sign that
>doesn't apply to you and can't find one to save your sorry old ass.
>
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In this day and age it is easier to stay stupid than it is to stay ignorant. I have had the misfortune to have encountered many informed idiots
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Old 03-08-2006, 02:13 PM   #2 (permalink)
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Quote:
26: You read this entire list looking desperately for one sign that
doesn't apply to you and can't find one to save your sorry old ass.
Damn it...
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Old 03-08-2006, 02:18 PM   #3 (permalink)
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number 5 did it for me. When I heard a watered down version of Smoke on the Water in an elevator I started looking for a retirement home!
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Old 03-08-2006, 02:26 PM   #4 (permalink)
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They had SMOKE ON THE WATER in an ELEVATOR??? The only reason Im not crying about that is because I wasnt personally there...
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Old 03-08-2006, 02:52 PM   #5 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by bulletboy
Damn it...
me and you both Brother ...me and you both
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When Injustice Becomes Law....Rebellion Becomes Duty


The only thing wrong with Abraham Lincoln's Gettysburg Address was that it was the South, not the North, that was fighting for a government of the people, by the people and for the people."

-- H. L. Mencken

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Old 03-08-2006, 03:37 PM   #6 (permalink)
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Wink

27. You look in the mirror and see this:
Attached Images
File Type: jpg The%20OLD%20COOT%20GUN%20OIL.jpg (27.6 KB, 55 views)
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Old 03-08-2006, 03:42 PM   #7 (permalink)
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by scubadvr
27. You look in the mirror and see this:

Damn it all SCUBA,..I..WISH I looked THAT GOOD!

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I don't wanna shoot no one,
but I crossed my old man back in Oregon,
don't take me alive.

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Old 03-08-2006, 03:44 PM   #8 (permalink)
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#25 hasn't happened yet, but it's the last one.
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Old 03-08-2006, 03:52 PM   #9 (permalink)
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I may be a dirty old man but number 2 doesn't apply.
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Old 03-08-2006, 06:24 PM   #10 (permalink)
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What if you looked like this......






Cephu-s is a prince now ain't he??
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When Injustice Becomes Law....Rebellion Becomes Duty


The only thing wrong with Abraham Lincoln's Gettysburg Address was that it was the South, not the North, that was fighting for a government of the people, by the people and for the people."

-- H. L. Mencken

One
Big
Ass
Mistake
America
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