Airport (TSA) Screening Results (4th quarter 2012)

[will6970]

Airport (TSA) Screening Results (4th quarter 2012)

June Statistics On Airport Screening From The Department Of Homeland Security:

Terrorists Discovered

0

Transvestites

133

Hernias

1,485

Hemorrhoid Cases

3,172

Enlarged Prostates

8,249

Breast Implants

59,350

Natural Blondes

3

It was also discovered that 535 members of Congress had no balls.

Not verified on “Snopes”...but sounds about right...

[jfreakofkorn]

Now that part of the Gov. is a Joke. Would love to cut Funding for that Part of the Gov.

[00redZX-6R]

I flew out just before Christmas. I made them give me a pat down just to be a prick. I also had my 5 cans of chew in the corner of my carry-on with the phone charger wrapped around them. They had to open my bag too.

They passed my little test.

[Tommo]

Thanks very funny!

[bellson]

I should not really admit this. But I just can not help myself.

I have this little tool kit. It is an 6x8 folding case, with a buzzilion tips like flat, phillips, star, hex, etc. It also has a multitool, similar to a leatherman.

I had this toolkit in my laptop backpack that goes with me on the plane every time I travel. I have taken at least 50 flights with this toolkit in my laptop backpack. Everywhere, from flyover destinations to the Big Apple.

I added a screw driver handle. Not once was I stopped.

I added FIVE extended length tips (5 " long). Not once was I stopped.

I TURNED two extended length tips into SHARP points. Still not stopped.

I added 5 feet of braided stainless cord, and "handles", along with a 3/4 lb ball. Still nothing.

I added 3 polymer blades, two of which were longer than 6". NOTHING!


So, to sum up. 50 flights minimum. Potentially 3+ "violations" per flight.

Result? NOTHING.

9/11 was perpetrated by 19 guys, working in concert, with a grand total of 6 (suspected) box cutters. At this point, my belief is that every cent we have expended on the TSA is a waste of time and money.

Just my $0.02.

BTW: None of the above is true. If it were true, I would be a felon. If it were true, I would be admitting to being a felon. I do not admit to having engaged in any illegal activity. The proceeding is provided as pure fantasy.

Draw your own conclusions.

[Abukai08]

Originally Posted by bellson

I should not really admit this. But I just can not help myself.

I have this little tool kit. It is an 6x8 folding case, with a buzzilion tips like flat, phillips, star, hex, etc. It also has a multitool, similar to a leatherman.

I had this toolkit in my laptop backpack that goes with me on the plane every time I travel. I have taken at least 50 flights with this toolkit in my laptop backpack. Everywhere, from flyover destinations to the Big Apple.

I added a screw driver handle. Not once was I stopped.

I added FIVE extended length tips (5 " long). Not once was I stopped.

I TURNED two extended length tips into SHARP points. Still not stopped.

I added 5 feet of braided stainless cord, and "handles", along with a 3/4 lb ball. Still nothing.

I added 3 polymer blades, two of which were longer than 6". NOTHING!


So, to sum up. 50 flights minimum. Potentially 3+ "violations" per flight.

Result? NOTHING.

9/11 was perpetrated by 19 guys, working in concert, with a grand total of 6 (suspected) box cutters. At this point, my belief is that every cent we have expended on the TSA is a waste of time and money.

Just my $0.02.

BTW: None of the above is true. If it were true, I would be a felon. If it were true, I would be admitting to being a felon. I do not admit to having engaged in any illegal activity. The proceeding is provided as pure fantasy.

Draw your own conclusions.

You hit the nail on the head. We need to ban box cutters. I have a hard time believing all the mass shootings this country has ever seen combined has totaled the casualties caused by a couple box cutters.