AMAZINGLY SIMPLE HOME REMEDIES
 

AMAZINGLY SIMPLE HOME REMEDIES

Avoid cutting yourself when slicing vegetables by getting someone else to hold them while you chop.

Avoid arguments with the Mrs. about lifting the toilet seat by using the sink.

For high blood pressure sufferers: simply cut yourself and bleed for a few minutes, thus reducing the pressure in your veins. Remember to use a timer.

A mouse trap, placed on top of your alarm clock, will prevent you from rolling over and going back to sleep after you hit the snooze button.

If you have a bad cough, take a large dose of laxatives; then you'll be afraid to cough.

You only need two tools in life - WD-40 and Duct Tape. If it doesn't move and should, use the WD -40. If it shouldn't move and does, use the duct tape.

Remember: Everyone seems normal until you get to know them.

If you can't fix it with a hammer, you've got an electrical problem.

Ha ha!
First they complain that I leave the seat up, then they complain when there's pee all over the seat. Make up your mind ladies!

Didn't hear that one before. :D

Me neither :rofl:

So I offered to put in a urinal.

And redo the whole bathroom. She took the bathroom but not the urinal.

Your just lucky it wasn't a Kitchen instead...$$$ LOL...
B2B

lol

good one

I hope I can remember all these jokes, they're great...

Bowels?