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Old 03-31-2011, 09:11 AM   #1 (permalink)
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Default "Awesome Police Report out of Augusta, GA"

"Augusta, GA
Orville Smith, a store manager for Best Buy in Augusta , Georgia , told police he observed a male customer, later identified as Tyrone Jackson of Augusta, on surveillance cameras putting a laptop computer under his jacket. When confronted the man became irate, knocked down an employee, drew a knife and ran for the door. Outside on the sidewalk were four Marines collecting toys for the "Toys for Tots" program. Smith said the Marines stopped the man, but he stabbed one of the Marines, a Cpl. Phillip Duggan, in the back; the injury did not appear to be severe. After Police and an ambulance arrived at the scene, Cpl. Duggan was transported for minor treatment. The subject was also transported to the local hospital with two broken arms, a broken ankle, a broken leg, several missing teeth, possible broken ribs, multiple facial contusions, assorted lacerations, a broken nose and a dislocated jaw...injuries he sustained when he slipped and fell off the curb after stabbing a US Marine.

Now that was a well written Police report."
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Old 03-31-2011, 09:51 AM   #2 (permalink)
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It's funny now but wait till Tyrone" lawyers up."
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Old 04-01-2011, 07:37 PM   #3 (permalink)
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You know Holder's working on it now...
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Old 04-17-2011, 10:47 PM   #4 (permalink)
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He must have got run over by a truck when he fell off that curb
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Old 04-27-2011, 11:08 PM   #5 (permalink)
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When i was in college in statesboro ga. One of the girls that lived above us got the hell beat out of her by her boyfreind. My roommate and I heard this happening so we went upstairs to check on her. When we got there she was laying on the floor bleading. My roommate and i then beat the shit out of the guy while someone else called the police. When the cop got there we told him what happened to the girl. Her boyfreind was also bleeding and yelling in the background that we beat him up. The cop turns to the boy and says "looks to me like you fell down the steps." then the boy starts yelling again that we beat him up so the cop says " I think i am getting another call. I would hate to have to leave and you fall down the steps again." Then the boy shutup and went to jail. I did not get to see a police report but can imagine it looked sort of like the one in OP story.
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