Idiot Sightings

[ptannjr]

IDIOT SIGHTING:
We had to have the garage door repaired. The Sears repairman told us that one of our problems was that we did not have a 'large' enough motor on the opener. I thought for a minute, and said that we had the largest one Sears made at that time, a 1/2 horsepower. He shook his head and said, 'Lady, you need a 1/4 horsepower.' I responded that 1/2 was larger than 1/4. He said, 'NO, it's not.' Four is larger than two.'
We haven't used Sears repair since.

IDIOT SIGHTING
My daughter and I went through the McDonald's take-out window and I gave the clerk a $5 bill. Our total was $4.25, so I also handed her a quarter. She said, 'you gave me too much money.' I said, 'Yes I know, but this way you can just give me a dollar bill back.' She sighed and went to get the manager who asked me to repeat my request. I did so, and he handed me back the quarter, and said Were sorry but they could not do that kind of thing.' The clerk then proceeded to give me back$1 and 75 cents in change.

Do not confuse the clerks at McD's.

IDIOT SIGHTING
I live in a semi rural area. We recently had a new neighbor call the local township administrative office to request the removal of the DEER CROSSING sign on our road. The reason: 'Too many deer are being hit by cars out here!I don't think this is a good place for them to be crossing anymore.'
From Kingman , KS .

IDIOT SIGHTING IN FOOD SERVICE:
My daughter went to a local Taco Bell and ordered a taco. She asked the person behind the counter for 'minimal lettuce.' He said he was sorry, but they only had iceburg lettuce.
From Kansas City

IDIOT SIGHTING:
I was at the airport, checking in at the gate when an airport employee asked, 'Has anyone put anything in your baggage without your knowledge?' To which I replied, 'If it was without my knowledge, how would I know?' He smiled knowingly and nodded,
'That's why we ask.'
Happened in Birmingham , Ala.

IDIOT SIGHTING:
The stoplight on the corner buzzes when it's safe to cross the street. I was crossing with an intellectually challenged coworker of mine. She asked if I knew what the buzzer was for. I explained that it signals blind people when the light is red. Appalled, she responded, 'What on earth are blind people doing driving?!'
She was a probation officer in Wichita , KS

IDIOT SIGHTING:
At a good-bye luncheon for an old and dear coworker. She was leaving the company due to 'downsizing.' Our manager commented cheerfully, 'This is fun. We should do this more often.' Not another word was spoken. We all just looked at each other with that deer-in-the-headlights stare.
This was a lunch at Texas Instruments.


IDIOT SIGHTING:
I work with an individual who plugged her power strip back into itself and for the sake of her life, couldn't understand why her system would not turn on.
A deputy with the Dallas County Sheriffs office, no less.


IDIOT SIGHTING:
When my husband and I arrived at an automobile dealership to pick up our car, we were told the keys had been locked in it. We went to the service department and found a mechanic working feverishly to unlock the drivers side door. As I watched from the passenger side, I instinctively tried the door handle and discovered that it was unlocked. 'Hey,' I announced to the technician, 'its open!' His reply, 'I know. I already got that side.'
This was at the Ford dealership in Canton , Mississippi

STAY ALERT!
They walk among us... And the scary part is that they VOTE and
They REPRODUCE !
Let's Be Careful Out There:Not only do they walk among us, most of them drive.

Be careful, very careful.....

[pjm204]

hahaha, those were pretty hilarious, are those first hand sightings? or did you find them somewhere?

[sniper69]

Originally Posted by pjm204

hahaha, those were pretty hilarious, are those first hand sightings? or did you find them somewhere?

It is making the email circuit right now..

[sjohnson]

IDIOT SIGHTING:
At a good-bye luncheon for an old and dear coworker. She was leaving the company due to 'downsizing.' Our manager commented cheerfully, 'This is fun. We should do this more often.' Not another word was spoken. We all just looked at each other with that deer-in-the-headlights stare.

Actually present for one where that happened.

[eyegun]

I went to med school in a small town in Ohio. The town was about 15,000 and the University (OU) about 15,000. Local liberal rag/newspaper.

Around spring time, there was a letter to the editor from a young coed. She was protesting daylight savings time. She said something to the effect that with the environement being the way it was, it wasn't right for the government to give us an extra hour of daylight and make global warming worse.

Also, I remember watching that series on TV called "Amish in the City". There was some skinny vegeterian on the show that was busting on someone for eating eggs for breakfast. She called the egg "a chicken abortion". Go figure. Dumbass blonde vegetarian that doesn't know squat about reproduction.....

[moleman]

Years ago while walking with a group of friends, we were aproached by an atractive girl carring a "fur is murder" sign who was trying to get us to sign a petition of sorts. She was quite lovely but what struck me most about her was her expensive looking leather coat. I politely told her no thanks and continued walking. She followed and persisted. So as loud as I could yell I said "you dumb b*%#@! what the hell do you think a leather coat is but a fur coat without the fur on it?" You could tell by the look on her face that she hadn't thought about that untill then as she put her sign down and quickly walked away to the laughter of everyone in ear shot.

[F-Troop]

I can't believe how funny this is. It's too bad that it is true.

[sjohnson]

A blonde and a brunette were walking down the street.

The brunette suddenly said "Oh look, how sad, a dead bird."

The blonde looks up in the sky and says "Where? Where?"

[Blazerbender]

At our shop my friend had to work on this car that the owner said the fuel pump was dead. After a preliminary inspection my friend found the distributor rotor wasn't spinning, and notified the owner. The owner indignantly responded "My buddy says it's the fuel pump!" I had to walk away stifling a laugh as my friend suggested he try a timing belt first.

[RogerWilco]

Good stuff