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B.U.F. (Bald, Ugly, Fat)
Join Date: Nov 2008
Location: PRK
Posts: 1,399
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Judgement
One evening, after attending the theatre, two gentlemen were walking
down the avenue when they observed a rather well-dressed and attractive
lady walking just ahead of them. "I'd give $500.00 to spend the night
with that woman." To their surprise, the young lady overheard the
remark and turning around, she said, "I'll take you up on that." She
had a neat appearance and a pleasant voice, so after bidding his
companion goodnight, the man accompanied the lady to ther apartment,
where they immediately went to bed.
The following morning, he presented her with $250.00 as he prepared
to leave. She demanded the rest of the money, stating, "If you don't
give me the other $250.00, I'll sue you for it." He laughed, saying,
"I'd like to see you get it on these grounds."
The next day, he was surprised when he received a summons ordering his
presence in court as defendant in a lawsuit. He hurried to his lawyer
and explained the details of the case. His lawyer said, "She can't
possibly get a judgement against you on such grounds. but it will be
interesting to see how her case is presented."
After the usual preliminaries, the lady's lawyer addressed the court
as follows:
"Your Honor, my client, this lady, is the owner of a piece of property
- a garden spot surrounded by a profuse growth of shrubbery, which she
agreed to rent to the defendant for a specified length of time, for the
sum of $500.00. The defendant took possession of the property, used it
extensively for the purpose for which it was rented; but upon evacuating
the premises, he paid only $250.00, one-half of the amount agreed upon.
The rent was not expensive, since this restricted property was not
available to all, and we ask judgement be granted the plantiff to assure
payment of the balance."
The defendant's lawyer was impressed and amused at the way his opponent
had presented the case. His defense, therefore, was somewhat altered
from the way he originally planned it.
"Your Honor", he said, "My client agrees that the young lady has a fine
piece of property, that he did rent such property from her for a time
and did derive a degree of pleasure from the transaction. However, my
client found a well on the property, around which he placed his own
stones, sank a shaft and erected a pump, all labor being performed
personally by him. We claim these improvements to the property were
sufficient to offset the rental of said property. We, therefore, ask
that judgement not be granted."
The young lady's lawyers' comeback was thus:
"Your Honor, my client agrees that the defendant did find a well on
the property and that he did make improvements, such as my opponent
has described. however, had the defendant not known the well existed
he would never have rented the property. Also, upon evacuating the
premises, the defendant removed the stones, pulled out the shaft and
took the pump with him. In doing so he not only dragged his equipment
through the shrubbery but left a hole much larger than it was prior
to his occupance, making it easily accessible to little children.
We, therefore, ask judgement be granted."
--- AND SHE GOT IT!
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"A great civilization is not conquered from without until it has destroyed itself from within.", Will Durant
"All that is necessary for the triumph of evil is that good men do nothing.", Edmund Burke
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