Texas survivor
 

Due to the popularity of the Survivor shows, Texas is planning to do
its own, entitled "Survivor-Texas Style". The contestants will start in
Dallas, travel to Waco, Austin, San Antonio, over to Houston and down
to Brownsville. They will then proceed up to Del Rio, on to El Paso,
then to Midland, Odessa, Lubbock, and Amarillo. From there, they'll
proceed to Abilene, Ft. Worth, and finally back to Dallas.
Each will be driving a pink Volvo with a bumper sticker that reads: "I'm
gay, I'm a vegetarian, I voted for Al Gore, George Strait Sucks, Hillary
in 2008, and I'm here to confiscate your guns!"
The first one that makes it back to Dallas alive, wins.