True story in todays paper

kernelkrink · 05-16-2012, 05:49 PM

Local boy, 19, was arrested yesterday. Dumbass is drunk, smashes a window of a home that is not his own. Wakes up the homeowner, who immediately grabs a gun and exits his house to confront the window breaker. The next door neighbor also hears the commotion and arrives armed. When the cops get there, the kid is being held at gunpoint from 2 different directions! Cops thank the gentlemen for their assistance, give the kid a breathalyzer, which he fails, then they cuff and stuff him into the cruiser. As they arrive at the jail, the cop is exiting the vehicle to remove the kid from the back seat, but young Jovan Miller has already managed to release himself from the car and is running down the street. Cops give chase, until he falls down. Mr Miller starts kicking the cops, so they Tazer his ass. He still kicks them. Finally, they manage to stuff him back into the car again and get him to the jail where he is charged with about a half dozen offenses, all but two committed after he was arrested!

His excuse? "I thought I was at a party and was just trying to get in....."

Tommo · 05-17-2012, 12:37 PM

That excuse is the best since my dog ate my homework!

**pupwag** · 05-17-2012, 05:27 PM

Pipe bombs to "reduce armadillo population"
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**FloridaAKM** · 05-18-2012, 06:52 PM

Twenty years ago, it would have been a situation where the Bubbas would have been told to, "Knock it off ". Now, they go to jail for very serious legal charges! The times, they are a changing for the worse!

GlobalCannibal77 · 05-18-2012, 07:32 PM

I find it funny that the two home-owners had no problem stopping the guy, but the police had to chase him down, and taze him...

kernelkrink · 05-18-2012, 09:00 PM

Remember that line from "Die Hard"? "You won't shoot me, you are a police man. Police men have rules". Pissed off homeowners with major firepower pointed at your alky muddled head? Not so much.

The excitement never ends. A day later we had a "fight" in our parking lot. Someone brought in a junky Kia with a "clutch problem". Of course, the engine was locked up, they wisely decide not to spend the Bux to replace it. So, apparently two brothers and their wimmen are there to remove the personal belongings from the vehicle. Next thing we know the Deputys are swarming the place, asking if our security cameras caught the "epic fight" in the side lot. They did, two guys at the hatch, one grabs a trash bag of something out of the back and turns away. The other guy grabs for the bag or something and hits him with his arm. The two grapple for like 3 seconds then wind up on the ground where the big guy basically just lays on top the little guy, immobilizing him. Maybe 10 seconds later they both get up and continue on like nothing happened. Brothers, go figure, probably not their first or even 50th fight. Anyway one of the wimmen is standing a few feet away and AFTER the guys get up she is calling 911 to report the "epic fight". WTF is wrong with people? All this over a junk car worth maybe $200 at the scrap yard and a bag of old clothes? Cops were talking several charges.......

**bellson** · 05-19-2012, 12:28 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by kernelkrink

Remember that line from "Die Hard"? "You won't shoot me, you are a police man. Police men have rules". Pissed off homeowners with major firepower pointed at your alky muddled head? Not so much.

The excitement never ends. A day later we had a "fight" in our parking lot. Someone brought in a junky Kia with a "clutch problem". Of course, the engine was locked up, they wisely decide not to spend the Bux to replace it. So, apparently two brothers and their wimmen are there to remove the personal belongings from the vehicle. Next thing we know the Deputys are swarming the place, asking if our security cameras caught the "epic fight" in the side lot. They did, two guys at the hatch, one grabs a trash bag of something out of the back and turns away. The other guy grabs for the bag or something and hits him with his arm. The two grapple for like 3 seconds then wind up on the ground where the big guy basically just lays on top the little guy, immobilizing him. Maybe 10 seconds later they both get up and continue on like nothing happened. Brothers, go figure, probably not their first or even 50th fight. Anyway one of the wimmen is standing a few feet away and AFTER the guys get up she is calling 911 to report the "epic fight". WTF is wrong with people? All this over a junk car worth maybe $200 at the scrap yard and a bag of old clothes? Cops were talking several charges.......

Hi Kernel,

Ever watch the movie "Idiocracy"?....If not, get a nice single malt and sit down for a roller coaster ride of stupidity.