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DADDY WARBUCKS
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WHY DID THE CHICKEN CROSS THE ROAD


George Bush's Answer


We don't really care why the chicken crossed the road. We just want to know if the chicken is on our side of the road or not. The chicken is either with us or it is against us. There is no middle ground here.





John Kerry's Answer


While serving in Vietnam, I was in favor of the chicken crossing the road. Then later I realized that there were those who needed the chicken on this side of the road. Now I would like to see the chicken on the other side of the road, unless of course it would be better served to be on this side of the road. Ideally, I think the chicken should be in the middle of the road.





Ralph Nader's Answer


The chicken's habitat on the original side of the road had been polluted by unchecked industrialist greed. The chicken did not reach the unspoiled habitat on other side of the road because it was crushed by the wheels of a gas-guzzling SUV.





Bill Gates' Answer


I have just released eChicken 2004, which will not only cross roads, but will lay eggs, file your important documents, and balance your checkbook and Internet Explorer is an inextricable part of eChicken.





Dr. Seuss' Answer


Did the chicken cross the road? Did he cross it with a toad? Yes, the chicken crossed the road, But why it crossed, I've not been told.





Ernest Hemingway's Answer


To die. In the rain. Alone.





Martin Luther King Jr.'s Answer


I envision a world where all chickens will be free to cross roads without having their motives called into question.





Grandpa's Answer


In my day, we didn't ask why the chicken crossed the road. Someone told us that the chicken crossed the road, and that was good enough for us.





Barbara Walters' Answer


Isn't that interesting? In a few moments we will be listening to the chicken tell, for the first time, the heart-warming story of how it experienced a serious case of molting and went on to accomplish its life-long dream of crossing the road.





Jerry Seinfield's Answer


Why doesn't anyone ever think to ask, "What the heck was this chicken doing walking around all over the place anyway?"





Pat Buchanan's Answer


To steal a job from a decent, hard-working American.





Jerry Falwell's Answer


Because the chicken was gay! Isn't it obvious? Can't you people see the plain truth in front of your face? The chicken was going to the "other side. "That's what they call it -- the other side. Yes, my friends, that chicken is gay. And, if you eat that chicken, you will become gay too. I say we boycott all chickens until we sort out this abomination that the liberal media whitewashes with seemingly harmless phrases like "the other side."





Aristotle's Answer


It is the nature of chickens to cross the road.





Captain Kirk's Answer


To boldly go where no chicken has gone before.





Bill Clinton's Answer


I did not cross the road with THAT chicken. What do you mean by chicken? Could you define chicken, please?





Albert Einstein's Answer


Did the chicken really cross the road or did the road move beneath the chicken?





Sigmund Freud's Answer


The fact that you are at all concerned that the chicken crossed the road reveals your underlying sexual insecurity.





L.A.P.D.'s Answer


Give me ten minutes with the chicken and I'll find out.





Louis Farrakhan's Answer


The road, you will see, represents the black man. The chicken crossed the "black man" in order to trample him and keep him down.





O.J. Simpson's Answer


It didn't. I was playing golf with it at the time.





Rush Limbaugh's Answer





I don't know why the chicken crossed the road, but I'll bet it was getting a government grant to cross the road, and I'll bet that somebody out there is already forming a support group to help chickens with crossing-the-road syndrome. Can you believe this? How much more of this can real Americans take? Chickens crossing the road paid for by their tax dollars. And when I say tax dollars, I'm talking about your money; the government took from you to build a road for chickens to cross.





Martha Stewart's Answer


No one called me to warn me which way that chicken was going. I had a standing order at the Farmer's Market to sell my eggs when the price dropped to a certain level. No little bird gave me any insider information.





Al Gore's Answer


I invented the chicken!





Colonel Sander's Answer


Did I miss one??
 

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:lol:
 

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To prove to the possum it could actually be done!
 

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7.62x39 said:
LMAO

Thanks Custer, I needed that
Yeah that was a good laugh!! :thankyou:
 

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Lupeloff said:
To prove to the possum it could actually be done!
:lol: :lol:
 
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